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Mr Squish will be 1 year old soon. So yesterday, I donned my Good Mummy Hat and bought the parenting bible The Mighty Toddler by Robin Barker.

I hadn’t read it before, so I just naturally assumed there was a chapter entitled “Palming Off Your Baby To Your Husband So You Can Have a Spontaneous Drinking Session With Your Mates”.

Because that’s precisely what I did 3 minutes after purchasing the book.

Now, I know what’s instantly going through your mind. You’re thinking it’s a travesty that the Australian Mother of the Year Awards nominations are now closed and that I wasn’t even considered.

I’m as mystified as you.

But, don’t worry as there’s always next year. I’m a shoe-in then. A SHOE-IN! In fact, I’m going to have a bottle of champagne tonight, to celebrate in advance.

Anyway, it was a lovely and unexpected catch-up yesterday. My husband, Mr Squish and I had just been meandering back from the bookshop, when I spotted the familiar face in the pub window.

“Bye bye!” I said to my husband and baby. “No, no, take the book with you. This is one area in which I need absolutely no assistance, thank you very much!”

So I sent my little family home and joined my friend NH in the pub. We sat and drank beers and laughed. We watched the lunchtime crowd and had a Cranky-Off about the tacky clothes “those young people” are wearing nowadays. NH may disagree, but I totally won.

Other friends arrived and we had more beers. It was a brief yet marvelous respite.

When I got home, I quickly flicked though Barker’s book. Sadly, that vital “Drinking Beers With Your Mates” chapter seems to be missing from my copy.

 

2 Responses to “The missing ‘Drinking Beer’ chapter”

  1. jacinta says:

    Hello. I mean, how many times do I have to offer to write that chapter with you (in the pub)?

    • Ms FOAS says:

      We should SO do that!

      It’d start off really well, then descend into spelling mistakes and incomplete sentences as we drank more and more. But that’s all completely appropriate. I love it!

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