Mr Squish will be 1 year old soon. So yesterday, I donned my Good Mummy Hat and bought the parenting bible The Mighty Toddler by Robin Barker.
I hadn’t read it before, so I just naturally assumed there was a chapter entitled “Palming Off Your Baby To Your Husband So You Can Have a Spontaneous Drinking Session With Your Mates”.
Because that’s precisely what I did 3 minutes after purchasing the book.
Now, I know what’s instantly going through your mind. You’re thinking it’s a travesty that the Australian Mother of the Year Awards nominations are now closed and that I wasn’t even considered.
I’m as mystified as you.
But, don’t worry as there’s always next year. I’m a shoe-in then. A SHOE-IN! In fact, I’m going to have a bottle of champagne tonight, to celebrate in advance.
Anyway, it was a lovely and unexpected catch-up yesterday. My husband, Mr Squish and I had just been meandering back from the bookshop, when I spotted the familiar face in the pub window.
“Bye bye!” I said to my husband and baby. “No, no, take the book with you. This is one area in which I need absolutely no assistance, thank you very much!”
So I sent my little family home and joined my friend NH in the pub. We sat and drank beers and laughed. We watched the lunchtime crowd and had a Cranky-Off about the tacky clothes “those young people” are wearing nowadays. NH may disagree, but I totally won.
Other friends arrived and we had more beers. It was a brief yet marvelous respite.
When I got home, I quickly flicked though Barker’s book. Sadly, that vital “Drinking Beers With Your Mates” chapter seems to be missing from my copy.
Hello. I mean, how many times do I have to offer to write that chapter with you (in the pub)?
We should SO do that!
It’d start off really well, then descend into spelling mistakes and incomplete sentences as we drank more and more. But that’s all completely appropriate. I love it!